


Breathe no more

by stella_polaris



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Canonical Character Death, F/M, Gen, Song fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-02
Updated: 2013-02-02
Packaged: 2017-11-27 21:58:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/666937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stella_polaris/pseuds/stella_polaris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kagura's thoughts as she dies...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Breathe no more

**Author's Note:**

> I was listening to Evanescence the other day and had to think of Kagura when I listened to Breathe no more… The second part deals with Kagura’s death scene. I didn’t copy it exactly, I just kept the dialogue like it was in the anime.

_I’ve been looking in the mirror for so long_

_That I’ve come to believe my soul’s on the other side._

 

Kagura stared at her reflection in the small mirror she was holding in her hand. Who was this person staring back at her? She didn’t know anymore… someone who didn’t even have a heart. She was incomplete, something was missing and it was not only her heart. She felt like a mere shell… empty. This didn’t make sense anymore. In the end, what would be left for her?

 

Angrily, she crushed the mirror in her hand, leaving it shattered and blood dripping from her hand as the shards cut into her palm…

 

_All the little pieces falling, shatter._   
_Shards of me,_   
_Too sharp to put back together._   
_Too small to matter,_   
_But big enough to cut me into so many little pieces._

 

Oh yes, Naraku thought he held her a prisoner. He had her heart and would crush it if she made any false move. What he didn’t think of was that, after all, her life didn’t seem so valuable to herself anymore. She could only be free when he was dead. And she would see to this. If she couldn’t do it herself, she would find someone who could… that stupid hanyou Inuyasha, maybe he was good for something after all.

 

Or Sesshoumaru…

 

_And I bleed,_   
_I bleed,_   
_And I breathe,_   
_I breathe no more._

 

She smiled bitterly as she thought of the daiyoukai. Yes, she had to admit, she had been foolish enough to hope he would help her… drawn in by his strength and she knew he wanted to see Naraku destroyed as well. But help her? He probably wouldn’t go as low as that… he had pride and she was below that, it seemed. She was nothing.

 

_Take a breath and I try to draw from my spirit's well…_

 

But this nothing, this empty shell, it wasn’t so empty as they all thought. Even Naraku seemed to have ignored the fact that she might have a will of her own. He really should have thought of that as he created her as his incarnation. She was the wind… she longed to be free…

 

_Lie to me,_   
_Convince me that I've been sick forever._   
_And all of this,_   
_Will make sense when I get better._

 

***

 

So that was the end. She had always wondered what it would be like to die… she had been afraid of the pain. But this was bearable… to be honest, it had hurt more when Naraku had given her her heart back. All of her emotions had seemed to catch up with her… seeking for the long lost connections between her heart and her body. And it had hurt. Not like any physical pain she had ever felt. Not like the pain when Naraku had taken hold of her heart. This was different.

 

It was a sort of bitterness that she didn’t know. It was like the broken pieces of her were being put back together, a broken mirror that had been fixed… now looking slightly distorted because of the cracks in its surface.

 

Kagura closed her eyes for a moment. She was about to die and she knew it. She had to admit she was scared. Was that also a feeling she had missed out on without her heart? She vaguely remembered the feeling, but not to this intensity… Alone. She would die alone and no one would miss her.

 

That was when she registered a presence. She wasn’t alone. And she didn’t dare to look up, for she was afraid her senses were playing tricks on her… he couldn’t truly be here? She looked up slowly… looking up at him from the grass where she was kneeling.

 

“Sesshou… maru…” she whispered.

 

What did he want here? Why had he come? Surely not because of… no, that was too much to hope for. He hadn’t come for her.

 

“I followed the scent of blood and miasma,” he said to her.

 

So that was it. He was merely after Naraku and the smell of his miasma had led him here… to her.

 

“I see,” Kagura said and a weak smile played on her lips, “You were expecting Naraku. Are you disappointed that I’m not Naraku?”

 

She lowered her head again, not wanting to show him how much his words affected her. Really… how could she be so foolish as to think he would come here for her? She knew she didn’t matter to him. Never had… and now… never would.

 

“I knew it was you.”

 

That simple statement caused her eyes to widen in shock.

 

“I see,” she replied, her voice breaking from the effort to talk. She felt she was getting weaker with every second. Not long now anymore… and she would die. Once and for all.

 

Kagura only vaguely registered how Sesshoumaru’s hand went to his sword. That sword could resurrect the dead, right? But there was no way, she could not be saved anymore… Naraku had made sure of that, she knew.

 

But still… she felt a wave of happiness wash over her. That Sesshoumaru would even think to save her. It was more than she had ever hoped for. Now that she had her heart back, she felt it… she loved the inuyoukai. What a strange feeling it was… it crushed her heart and made her happy at the same time. Kagura was sure that wasn’t because she was dying… it was simply how it was supposed to feel like. She had never felt the feeling before and still knew it…

 

“Are you leaving?” Sesshoumaru asked in his usual calm voice.

 

The wind picked up, raising up flower petals from the meadow around them and creating an almost surreal scene.

 

“Yes,” the wind sorceress answered quietly, “it’s enough.”

 

Sesshoumaru stayed quiet. He just continued to look at her. And Kagura was happy. Even if she hadn’t managed to kill Naraku, she knew that Sesshoumaru or his brother and his friends would see to it. She knew her death wouldn’t be in vain.

 

Kagura raised her head to look at Sesshoumaru once more. “I saw you… one last time,” she all but whispered and she could already see the images in front of her get blurry. It was getting hard to focus. This was it… and she smiled.

 

She felt her body fall back. No pain. No regrets. Nothing. Only this warm, fuzzy feeling.

 

_But I know the difference,_   
_Between myself and my reflection._

 

She wasn’t nobody. She was somebody. She was Kagura, the wind sorceress and she had finally gotten what she had always desired. Her freedom.

 

And she knew he cared for her. Too proud to say it, but his presence here betrayed him… Sesshoumaru had cared for her. He was with her when she died, when all the energy finally left her and she felt her body dissolve into air. Wind.

 

“I am the wind. The free wind.”

 

That was the last thing she thought as her spirit became one with the wind around her.

 

_I breathe no more._

 

She was free…


End file.
